Target text（文章正文）:
Many graduatess （修改為graduates）nowadays confront a indecisive problem in how to select their job. Considering the pressuure（拼寫錯誤，修改為pressure) and high prequisite in appliance, students who still focus on their primary study are more likely to choose a major that their parents have been. The reasons are obvious that both students and their family members think the choice in a familiar field is more adaptable in future because students can enjoy talent, experiences（修改為experience） and admire (這里需要用名詞，修改為admiration）.
In my opinion, talent is a paramount need for students to judge their future major because the advantage formed at birth is always negligible. （開篇點題，很好）My friend Lydia is a outgoing person who wants to major in economy because of her outstanding idea in Mathematics inherit （修改為which is inherited） from her mother who is a HR and shares a different understanding in economy with（修改為from） the others. Actually, such the similarity in talent between children and parents are also enjoyed by a lot of celebrities, such as the politician Big Bush and his son.So it is talent that earns more credence in selecting a major which will influence children on their future jobs.
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As we often assumes that experiences from ancestors are essential for the further growth of children, regarding the intimate relationship between students and their parents, such influence is undoutable.Not only can children learn various experiences and resources from their parents, but also likely to have a deeper horizon at direct topic contributing to the advance of the company of their parents. So, it is comparable to choose a familiar subject as a major with the experiences from their parents .
Finally, according to the hereditary in jobs, both parents and the children will be more easily to be honored for their contribution to the the major. As is known by all that children are susceptible to be adorable if their parents have created a good public praise. Once I had learnt a story that a black boy were supposed to be honest because his parents were always keeping their word in the past. From this example, we can judge a similar conclusion that children will enjoy the honor made by their parents, so that it also makes them to have a firm believe in their major and encourages them to learn more from thair parents.There are also a kind of students who want to get rid of the shade of their parents and surpass them, so the admire to their parents can be recognized as a stimuli.
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To sumarize my opinions, I reiterate that it is better for chidren to choose jobs that are similar to their parents jobs than else talent, experiences and admire they attain（不知想要表達(dá)什么意思）.
TPO小站綜合點評及批改意見：
文章條理清晰，但論證缺乏多樣性，建議每段采用不同的論證方法 。另外，有一些語法錯誤及拼寫錯誤。寫完之后，注意做相應(yīng)的修改檢查。
預(yù)估分?jǐn)?shù)：3.5
