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中考英語(yǔ)話題作文：為祖國(guó)成就而自豪 <a Href=http://www.zequeka.cn/minifoRm.html>蘇州作文輔導(dǎo)班</a>

【背景介紹】

<a hRef=http://www.zequeka.cn/MiNiFoRm.html>蘇州中考作文培訓(xùn)</a>

從過(guò)去幾年來(lái)看，中國(guó)經(jīng)濟(jì)在國(guó)內(nèi)國(guó)際復(fù)雜形勢(shì)下仍然保持了較高增速，經(jīng)濟(jì)結(jié)構(gòu)不斷優(yōu)化升級(jí)，經(jīng)濟(jì)總量達(dá)到了82.7萬(wàn)億元，貧困人口減少了6800多萬(wàn)，城鎮(zhèn)新增就業(yè)6600萬(wàn)人以上，重點(diǎn)城市重污染天數(shù)減少一半等，都為中國(guó)經(jīng)濟(jì)持續(xù)發(fā)展創(chuàng)造了良好基礎(chǔ)。在他看來(lái)，這些令人矚目的成績(jī)?cè)谥袊?guó)和當(dāng)代世界發(fā)展歷史上都是不曾有過(guò)的，40年的改革開(kāi)放使中國(guó)在邁向全面建成小康社會(huì)的道路上又進(jìn)了一步。

<a hRef=http://www.zequeka.cn/miNiform.html>蘇州閱讀寫作培訓(xùn)</a>

【佳作賞析】

A

2021年是中國(guó)共產(chǎn)黨成立100周年, 盛世華誕, 舉國(guó)同慶。在這100年里, 我國(guó)發(fā)生了翻天覆地的變化并取得了舉世矚目的成就。請(qǐng)根據(jù)下表提示, 以The Changes in China為題, 寫一篇80詞左右的短文。

要求：

1. 文中不得出現(xiàn)真實(shí)的人名和校名;

2. 語(yǔ)言通順, 要點(diǎn)齊全, 意思連貫,條理清楚。

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

【答案】

The Changes in China

With the development of society, China has changed a lot. In the past, the houses were old and small and people were leading a poor life. The roads were so narrow that the traffic wasn’t convenient at all. What’s worse, the communication developed slowly and people had little entertainment activities.

Now, great changes have taken place. We live in big and bright houses with well-suited furniture. More and more families have cars. The roads are becoming wider and wider which make the traffic more and more convenient. Besides, people have more kinds of activities.

I believe our country will become more and more beautiful.

【詳解】

1.題干解讀：本文緊跟時(shí)代熱點(diǎn)，描寫新中國(guó)的變化。材料的表格內(nèi)容清晰，分別從兩方面進(jìn)行描寫，過(guò)去和現(xiàn)在。同學(xué)們要捋清楚思路，在寫作的過(guò)程中，將過(guò)去與現(xiàn)在進(jìn)行對(duì)比，符合邏輯即可。

2.例文點(diǎn)評(píng)：本文采用三段式，段落布局清晰，首段描寫過(guò)去，主要采用一般過(guò)去時(shí)。而第二段對(duì)現(xiàn)在進(jìn)行描寫，采用一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)。與第一段的內(nèi)容進(jìn)行一一對(duì)應(yīng)。第三段則是對(duì)將來(lái)的展望。

3.高分亮點(diǎn)：

短語(yǔ)：with the development of；lead a poor life；What’s worse。

句型：so…that；which引導(dǎo)定語(yǔ)從句。

B

2020年新冠肺炎疫情發(fā)生后，為了更好地保障同桌就餐人員的衛(wèi)生安全，國(guó)家大力宣傳并提倡家庭及餐飲機(jī)構(gòu)提供公筷，以方便取食。對(duì)此不同的人有不同的看法。請(qǐng)根據(jù)下表內(nèi)容，寫一篇英語(yǔ)短文。

提示詞：serving chopsticks（公筷）

要求：

1．短文需涵蓋表格中所有內(nèi)容，可適當(dāng)發(fā)揮；

2．行文連貫、條理清楚、語(yǔ)句通順、語(yǔ)法正確、書(shū)寫規(guī)范；

3．詞數(shù)：80～100，開(kāi)頭已給出，不計(jì)入總詞數(shù)。

In order to better protect be health and safety or dinning staff at the same table, many families and restaurants provide serving chopsticks._______________________________________________________________________

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

_____________________________________________________________________________________________

【答案】

In order to better protect be health and safety or dinning staff at the same table, many families and restaurants provide serving chopsticks. Different people have different opinions about it. Some people think it is convenient, sanitary and safe to use serving chopsticks. And it can help avoid infection. Others think they often forget to use serving chopsticks. It is embarrassing to use serving chopsticks when friends and relatives gather for a meal.

In my opinion, the use of serving chopsticks is a sign of civilization. It is important to protect the health and safety of yourself and those around you. Family and friendship will not change because of serving chopsticks.

【詳解】

1.題干解讀：該題目屬于議論文寫作，題目要求根據(jù)表格提示，寫一篇文章闡述不同的人對(duì)提供公筷的不同看法，并發(fā)表自己的觀點(diǎn)。

2.寫作指導(dǎo)：本文應(yīng)該用第三人稱為主來(lái)論述內(nèi)容；時(shí)態(tài)采用一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)；在寫作時(shí)，力求觀點(diǎn)明確，論據(jù)充分，語(yǔ)言準(zhǔn)確，條理清晰。

C

“綠水青山就是金山銀山"，堅(jiān)持節(jié)約資源和保護(hù)環(huán)境是我國(guó)的基本國(guó)策。請(qǐng)以”共建綠色家園”為主題，根據(jù)以下文字提示，請(qǐng)你寫一篇英語(yǔ)短文向校報(bào)投稿，并適當(dāng)發(fā)表自 己的觀點(diǎn)。

注意：

（1）短文應(yīng)包括所有要點(diǎn)；

（2）詞數(shù)80-120詞（開(kāi)頭已給出，不計(jì)入詞數(shù)）；

（3）不得透露學(xué)校、姓名等任何個(gè)人信息，否則不予評(píng)分。

Let's build a green home together!

As we all know , the environment around us is getting worse and worse. ____________________________   

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

【答案】

Let's build a green home together！

As we all know, the environment around us is getting worse and worse. Waste and pollution become more and more serious, which has a bad effect on our earth. As a middle school student. it's time for us to protect our earth, to help build a green home.

We must take some action. Firstly, we should often go outside on foot or by bike instead of car. Therefore, we can avoid the traffic jams and reduce the air pollution. Secondly, we had better use cloth shopping bags rather than plastic bags when we go shopping. Otherwise, using too much plastic bags may cause mountains of rubbish and pollute the land. Thirdly, turn off the light when we leave, as a result, we can save much energy. Last but not least, it is a good way to plant more threes, which can make our earth become greener and more beautiful.

【詳解】

1. 題干解讀：該題目屬于材料作文，要求以”共建綠色家園”為主題寫一篇英語(yǔ)短文向校報(bào)投稿。需要包括的內(nèi)容有主題，必要性和四點(diǎn)建議。

2. 例文點(diǎn)評(píng)：例文用第一人稱復(fù)數(shù)來(lái)進(jìn)行倡議，使語(yǔ)言更有感染力；時(shí)態(tài)主要采用一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)。文章條理清晰、內(nèi)容全面，材料要求的所有內(nèi)容都有涉及，描述建議時(shí)還很好地應(yīng)用了表示順序的詞firstly, secondly等，使得層次分明。

3. 高分亮點(diǎn)：

短語(yǔ)：worse and worse；take action；last but not least；instead of；rather than。

句型：as we all know；have an effect on；it’s time to do sth.；had better do sth.；when引導(dǎo)的時(shí)間狀語(yǔ)從句；which引導(dǎo)的非限定性定語(yǔ)從句。

D

近年來(lái)中國(guó)不斷取得重大的科技成就。除航空航天領(lǐng)域外，我國(guó)在醫(yī)療、計(jì)算機(jī)、生物、農(nóng)業(yè)、基建等各個(gè)領(lǐng)域也取得了非凡的成就。就目前來(lái)看，我國(guó)各行各業(yè)發(fā)展迅速，跨行業(yè)、跨領(lǐng)域發(fā)展前景寬廣。作為祖國(guó)未來(lái)的希望，你未來(lái)想從事什么行業(yè)？請(qǐng)以“My Dream Job”為題，寫一篇英文短文，講述你未來(lái)想要從事的工作。

要點(diǎn)：

1、你想從事的工作；

2、你想從事這項(xiàng)工作的原因；

3、你打算怎么做呢？

要求：

1、不少于80詞；

2、可適當(dāng)增加細(xì)節(jié)，以使行文連貫；

3、文中不得出現(xiàn)真實(shí)人名和校名。

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

【答案】

My Dream Job

　Everyone has his dream. My dream is to be a doctor. When I was in Grade seven, I was sick and often went to see doctors. The doctors were very friendly to me and they often cheered me up. With the help of them, I was getting better. Since then I have hoped to become a doctor. I will study hard to get more knowledge in order to achieve my dream. I'll give my love to the patients as much as possible and help them out of danger.

　　To be a doctor is really great. I think my dream will come true one day.

【詳解】

1、題干解讀：該題目屬于記敘文寫作，是話題作文，談?wù)撃阄磥?lái)想從事什么行業(yè)。仔細(xì)閱讀提示要點(diǎn)，這是寫作提綱，寫作必須包含所有要點(diǎn)，但可以適當(dāng)發(fā)揮。根據(jù)要點(diǎn)提示，作文必須包含以下三個(gè)方面：1、你想從事的工作；2、你想從事這項(xiàng)工作的原因；3、你打算怎么做呢？

2、寫作指導(dǎo)：根據(jù)要點(diǎn)提示，本文使用多種時(shí)態(tài)，可能會(huì)使用到一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)、一般過(guò)去時(shí)、一般將來(lái)時(shí)、現(xiàn)在完成時(shí)等時(shí)態(tài)，注意時(shí)態(tài)的轉(zhuǎn)換和主謂一致等問(wèn)題。像表達(dá)“你想從事的工作”要使用一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)，表達(dá)“你想從事這項(xiàng)工作的原因”可以使用一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)，也可能使用一般過(guò)去時(shí)等時(shí)態(tài)，注意時(shí)態(tài)的選??；在表達(dá)“你打算怎么做呢？”時(shí)，使用的時(shí)態(tài)是一般將來(lái)時(shí)。敘述要條理連貫，表達(dá)清楚，注意拼寫、標(biāo)點(diǎn)、語(yǔ)法，書(shū)寫要規(guī)范整潔。

E

今年上映的大型紀(jì)錄片《厲害了！我的國(guó)》展現(xiàn)了我國(guó)近幾年來(lái)各個(gè)領(lǐng)域的巨大變化和取得的偉大成就。請(qǐng)你以“Amazing China！”為題，從中學(xué)生的角度介紹你身邊的變化。

寫作要求：

1.表達(dá)清楚，語(yǔ)法正確，上下文連貫；

2.詞數(shù)：80詞左右（開(kāi)頭已給出，不計(jì)入總詞數(shù)）；

3.文中不得出現(xiàn)真實(shí)的姓名，校名和地名。

參考詞匯：free breakfast, shared-bikes（共享單車），high-speed train（高鐵）， subway（地鐵）， Wechat Pay（微信支付）， community service（社區(qū)服務(wù)），life quality

Amazing！China！

I’m very proud of my country-China, especially after watching the documentary Amazing! China. Actually, our life has changed a lot in recent years. _______________________________________________                                                       

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

【答案】

Amazing! China!

I’m very proud of my country—China, especially after watching the documentary Amazing! China!. Actually, our life has changed a lot in recent years.

First, there are some shared-bikes around us. They’re very helpful and convenient for us to travel to places not too far away from our home.

Secondly, lots of restaurants offer the old and disabled people free breakfast. Besides, the government provide textbooks, meals for all the primary and junior middle school students for free. The old people over sixty ages can get some money from the government every month to feed themselves.

Thirdly, you can see high-speed trains, subways and high-speed roads everywhere in China. It shows China is developing fastest in the world.

What’s more, WeChat Pay is widely used in cities, towns and villages. The Chinese people of all ages can use their smart phones to shop online, watch the latest movies. Lots of foreigners can hardly believe their eyes.

Finally, all kinds of community services are good for Chinese people, including medical, educational and other parts of our life. All these mean we are improving our life quality.

How amazing China is! We’re proud of our country!

【詳解】

這是一篇話題作文，話題是“Amazing China！”。本文人稱主要是第三人稱，時(shí)態(tài)主要是一般現(xiàn)在時(shí)。認(rèn)為閱讀材料，認(rèn)真審題，確定主題，根據(jù)主題和所給提示列出本文的提綱，根據(jù)主題可適當(dāng)發(fā)揮。短文必須包含提示內(nèi)容，條理清楚，字?jǐn)?shù)80詞左右。要運(yùn)用合適的連接詞或過(guò)渡詞，使文章具有連貫性，注意表達(dá)的順序。寫完以后，注意再讀一遍，看看有無(wú)單詞拼寫、標(biāo)點(diǎn)、語(yǔ)法錯(cuò)誤（時(shí)態(tài)、主謂一致等）。本文提綱：

厲害了！中國(guó)！

我為我的祖國(guó)中國(guó)感到驕傲，尤其是在看了這部紀(jì)錄片之后！中國(guó)！事實(shí)上，近年來(lái)我們的生活發(fā)生了很大的變化。

首先，我們周圍有一些共享單車。它們對(duì)我們來(lái)說(shuō)很有幫助，也很方便去離家不遠(yuǎn)的地方旅行。

第二，許多餐館為老年人和殘疾人提供免費(fèi)早餐。此外，政府還免費(fèi)為所有中小學(xué)生提供教科書(shū)、食物。60歲以上的老人每月可以從政府那里領(lǐng)到一些錢來(lái)養(yǎng)活自己。

第三，在中國(guó)到處都可以看到高速列車、地鐵和高速公路。這表明中國(guó)在世界上發(fā)展最快。

此外，微信支付在城市、城鎮(zhèn)和農(nóng)村中得到了廣泛的應(yīng)用。所有年齡段的中國(guó)人都可以用他們的智能手機(jī)上網(wǎng)購(gòu)物，看最新的電影。很多外國(guó)人簡(jiǎn)直不敢相信自己的眼睛。

最后，各種社區(qū)服務(wù)對(duì)中國(guó)人民都是有益的，包括醫(yī)療、教育和我們生活的其他部分。所有這些都意味著我們正在提高生活質(zhì)量。

中國(guó)是多么厲害??！我們?yōu)槲覀兊膰?guó)家感到驕傲！

【點(diǎn)睛】

書(shū)面表達(dá)要求將所規(guī)定的材料內(nèi)容經(jīng)整理后展開(kāi)思維，考查運(yùn)用所學(xué)英語(yǔ)知識(shí)準(zhǔn)確表達(dá)意思的能力?？忌荒苓z漏要點(diǎn)，要盡量使用自己熟悉的單詞、短語(yǔ)和句式，盡可能使用高級(jí)詞匯和較復(fù)雜的句式結(jié)構(gòu)以便得到較高的分?jǐn)?shù)。語(yǔ)言要規(guī)范，時(shí)態(tài)運(yùn)用要正確，敘述清楚條里，信息表達(dá)清晰、完整，意思連貫。要學(xué)以致用。像First, Secondly, Thirdly, Finally表示順序的詞，使文章表達(dá)更清楚條里。（1）學(xué)習(xí)中注意總結(jié)，牢記一些固定句式及短語(yǔ)，寫作時(shí)就可以適當(dāng)引用，使文章的表達(dá)更有邏輯性，更富有條理。（2）列好提綱和要點(diǎn)及需要的重要短語(yǔ)或句型。（3）切忌堆砌詞語(yǔ)、句子，注意運(yùn)用適當(dāng)?shù)倪B詞使句子流暢、連貫。注意表達(dá)的順序。 （4）注意書(shū)寫的規(guī)范：大小寫、標(biāo)點(diǎn)符號(hào)等的正確運(yùn)用。  （5）注意檢查：?jiǎn)卧~拼寫、語(yǔ)法、動(dòng)詞時(shí)態(tài)、語(yǔ)序、主謂一致等。寫作六步法：1.審題：文體，時(shí)態(tài)，人稱。2.抓住要點(diǎn)：要點(diǎn)是否齊全，適當(dāng)補(bǔ)充。3.擴(kuò)充句子：通過(guò)增加狀語(yǔ)，定語(yǔ)，連詞，使句子意思飽滿充實(shí)。4.連句成文，合理使用連詞。5.改正錯(cuò)誤：拼寫是否錯(cuò)誤，語(yǔ)法時(shí)態(tài)是否正確，連詞是否恰當(dāng)?shù)取?/span>6.謄寫作文：注意書(shū)寫工整美觀整潔。

F

每一個(gè)中國(guó)人都在為“中國(guó)夢(mèng)”的實(shí)現(xiàn)而努力，我們的家鄉(xiāng)福建也發(fā)生了巨大的變化。請(qǐng)描述一下家鄉(xiāng)的變化吧，可以從環(huán)境、科技、出行方式、溝通方式等各方面進(jìn)行介紹；并說(shuō)一下你將如何努力為家鄉(xiāng)建設(shè)貢獻(xiàn)一份力。詞數(shù)100左右。

注意：文中不得出現(xiàn)真實(shí)人名、地名、校名等。

___________________________________________________________________________________________

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

【答案】

Everyone has been making an effort to realize Our Chinese Dream, and at the same time, my hometown, Fujian, has changed a lot in many ways.

First, the environment in Fujian has become better and better because of our strong sense of environmental protection and our government’s efficient and wonderful methods. What’s more, with the development of science and technology, we can communicate more easily and conveniently than ever before. There is no doubt that we have more choices of going out, such as well-developed bus system and subway.

I am proud of these great changes of my hometown, so I am prepared to try my best to make it more beautiful. I have a strong desire to study hard and get into my dream senior high, then my ideal university. In the future, I will spare no effort to devote to my job, being a great teacher!

【詳解】

1. 題干解讀：文章是一篇話題作文，主要是以“中國(guó)夢(mèng)”為主題，寫出自己家鄉(xiāng)發(fā)生的一些變化，包括環(huán)境，科技和出行自己溝通方式等方面，還要寫出自己將要為家長(zhǎng)建設(shè)要做哪些功效，把題目中的這些要求寫清楚具體即可。

2. 例文點(diǎn)評(píng)：文章主要是分三段描寫。第一段主要總述自己的家長(zhǎng)發(fā)生了很大的變化；第二段主要寫家鄉(xiāng)各方面發(fā)生的具體的變化；第三段主要寫將要為家長(zhǎng)建設(shè)做的一些貢獻(xiàn)。整個(gè)文章結(jié)構(gòu)完整，語(yǔ)言表達(dá)通順，意思明確易懂，詞匯應(yīng)用恰當(dāng)。

3. 高分亮點(diǎn)：

短語(yǔ)：make an effort；at the same time；because of；what’s more；be proud of；spare no effort。

句型：that引導(dǎo)的同位語(yǔ)從句；so引導(dǎo)的并列句I am proud of these great changes of my hometown, so I am prepared to try my best to make it more beautiful.。