對(duì)很多中國托福 考生來說，寫作實(shí)際上是個(gè)翻譯過程，如何把思想中的中文轉(zhuǎn)化成現(xiàn)實(shí)中的英文是托福 基礎(chǔ)寫作最關(guān)心的問題，也是學(xué)生們首要應(yīng)該解決的問題。但是我們的學(xué)生受思維定式的影響，如果在新托福寫作中套漢語思維，就是中式化英語的表現(xiàn)。這只能使文章語言蹩腳、冗贅。所以考生在托福寫作備考時(shí)，要注意英語表達(dá)和漢語表達(dá)的差別，最重要的一點(diǎn)是托福寫作應(yīng)避免中式英文。
1、Original: If we agree to say that school offers us the best book knowledge acquisition then our society offers us the best surviving techniques in a hard way.
Revised: If we agree that school offers the best method for the acquisition of book knowledge, then our society offers us the best method for acquiring common sense or “street smarts”. 蘇州易優(yōu)語文閱讀寫作培訓(xùn)，家長(zhǎng)信賴，學(xué)生喜歡。 http://www.zequeka.cn
Agree to say that表達(dá)中式化，只需要agree that即可;the best book knowledge acquisition改為the best method for the acquisition of book knowledge(學(xué)校給我們提供了獲取書本知識(shí)的最好方法 )更為恰當(dāng) ，同樣后面的the best surviving techniques改為the best method for acquiring common sense,加上street marks(街頭智慧)給文章的托福詞匯增添色彩。
2、Original: They can spend more time studying education and communication to improve their role as a mother, wife and daughter.
Revised: They can also decide to spend more time studying, education themselves, in order to improve themselves in their roles as mothers, wives and daughters.
原句中studying education and communication的說法中式化，不符合英語的表述，應(yīng)該為studying，educating themselves。除了詞語表達(dá)，此句中還存在其他問題，如名詞單復(fù)數(shù)的使用：不是提高他們的角色，而是提高他們自身以扮演好母親角色。
易優(yōu)語文培訓(xùn)，（TeL:181-1815-9898）蘇州閱讀寫作同步提升
還有，女性不止一個(gè)人。很多人都在扮演母親角色，role和mother應(yīng)用復(fù)數(shù)，故將improve their role as a mother改為improve themselves in their roles as mother;同樣，為保持一致，wife和daughter也可用復(fù)數(shù)，原文中wife的復(fù)數(shù)寫法有誤，應(yīng)該是wives。
3、Original：If you can get the point of communication by watching TV，will you...?
Revised：If one can learn about communicating from television，will you...?
原句的get the point of communication by watching TV表達(dá)不清，讓人難以理解，應(yīng)該是指“從電視上學(xué)習(xí)交際”：learn about communicating from television.
